40 Comments
User's avatar
Louise (they/them)'s avatar

I love every single one of your posts and am resonating with your point of decentering romance from life…the world is incredibly allocentric among other things that we aspire toward romantic partnership(queer partnership)

Expand full comment
Margo Hinton's avatar

Super grateful. On the April 8th eclipse, my relationship ended with a mutual parting of ways that was first verbalized by my former partner. My therapist had said that relationship had ended in October so I was prepared. I met someone in June that I am deeply in love with. The current eclipse has brought an avalanche of issues to my work life and somehow it’s crept into my new relationship. We are taking a beat and I’m taking a self-inflicted beating. Thanks for offering perspective. I’ll focus on myself and quite possibly find the happiness, I’ve been seeking in others. BTW I’m also a Black Gay Women trying to navigate this life.

Expand full comment
Alex thee Black Femme ⚢'s avatar

Thank you for taking the time to read my work Margo!! 🩷🙏🏾 And wow, a solar eclipse in the first house is definitely a lot to handle. I love that you’ve been able to find love after the Spring eclipse. I pray that this recent one has brought you revelations that beget stability and clarity.

Expand full comment
d'mia's avatar

there’s so many things i’d like to comment on but first, i’d like to say i really enjoyed reading this. as someone who just came “out” (ig?) or accepted my sexuality i have been very aware of a common theme amongst the Black queer community. it is unfortunate how bad white supremacy and antiBlackness pans out or seeps through our different communities and ways of being. i know you mentioned not wanting advice so i will be respectful of that but the hopefulness person i am (plus the hopeless romantic libra girly lol) i wholeheartedly believe you’ll find the love you once desired. with that being said, i think it’s great that you’ve come to the place you’re at. the act of letting go or decenturing things that have weighed you down is the best way to go. wishing you the best on your journey!

*also, when i first got home post-grad i had got super depressed being back in my childhood room but i found that once i redecorated and shifted the energy in my from from baby mia to adult mia my room has felt way more at home. hopefully this helps!

Expand full comment
Alex thee Black Femme ⚢'s avatar

Thank you for reading and commenting D’mia!! 🥹💖 I truly appreciate it. And same, I was new to the queer community and did not expect to deal with the levels of anti blackness and white supremacy that I’ve seen. I had a romanticized view of it all, but the effects of white supremacy are pervasive GLOBALLY. As a community, we have work to do. And thank you for the advice!! I have rearranged my room, but the best thing that has helped has been getting out of this damn house 🤣 Thanks again!! 💖

Expand full comment
d'mia's avatar

agreed, and of course! i’ve been trying to get out the house more as well so cheers to the both of us for that lol

Expand full comment
Litcuzzwords's avatar

For your age, you are an amazingly self aware soul. I wish you joy.

Expand full comment
Alex thee Black Femme ⚢'s avatar

Thank you so much 🙏🏾🩷

Expand full comment
quixotica's avatar

I’m not into astrology but as a black sapphic woman who lives in the south, I definitely saw a lot of myself reflected back to me in this piece so I really appreciate you sharing your experience.

After leaving a very emotionally intense/dependent relationship earlier this year and not having the opportunity to interact with other black queer people, I am also decentering romantic love. It is extremely difficult due to my past experiences of feeling undesirable but I know it’s very much needed. I also really identify with the sentiment that queerness is much more than being in a relationship and i’m currently trying to discover what that looks like for me.

I am hoping that you continue to flourish in your work and your journey <3.

Expand full comment
Alex thee Black Femme ⚢'s avatar

Southern Black sapphics unite!!! Thank you for this wonderful comment. I agree, recentering romance while dealing with desirability is a difficult feat. I have faith that we find a way through, and on the other side we will find peace. 🩵💕

Expand full comment
zoe's avatar

your writing always resonates w/ me! especially decentering romantic partnership as a black lesbian! saturn is retrograde my 7th house, so i relate to letting go of limiting beliefs about yourself 🫨 i loved reading this <3

Expand full comment
Alex thee Black Femme ⚢'s avatar

I’m happy to hear this resonated with you!! And yeah, Saturn retrograde is also definitely adding to this intensity. I can’t wait to leave eclipse and retrograde season behind us 😩 Thank u for reading 🫶🏾

Expand full comment
Jaz's avatar

I intensely related to this post. From just graduating and navigating this job market, to romantic and sexual rejections and limiting beliefs. Definitely gonna journal and reflect on this post. Thank you for sharing so vulnerably and authentically.

Expand full comment
Alex thee Black Femme ⚢'s avatar

Thank you, I’m glad it resonated with you! It’s tough being a young adult, we have so much to navigate and so little instructions. ❣️

Expand full comment
Margo Hinton's avatar

Libra Rising so it’s real deep!

Expand full comment
Dru's avatar

THIS!!! so much of what you had written resonated so deeply with me! i’m shocked by how many overlaps there are in our experiences and i feel less alone knowing that there’s another person out there who has been there (or, is there) i now also feel compelled to cultivate a stronger relationship with astrology. thank you for your vulnerability🪷💌‼️

Expand full comment
Serena Dokuaa's avatar

Loved this piece so much. Excited to read more of your work and sending good vibes as you center yourself!

Expand full comment
Alex thee Black Femme ⚢'s avatar

Thank you Serena! 💖🫶🏾 I appreciate your support 🥹

Expand full comment
Tori 🌸's avatar

I recently made the decision to decenter queer romantic relationships for a certain period of time in my life. It’s been almost a month and I’ve been thriving! I’ve poured all that love I always gave away into myself. And I’m so much better for it. I’ve never felt more fulfilled. This will do you good, Alex. You’ll see 🫂

Expand full comment
Alex thee Black Femme ⚢'s avatar

I’m glad to hear that you’re thriving Victoria!!! I hope to get there soon, in due time. Thank you so much for reading and commenting 💕

Expand full comment
Tori 🌸's avatar

I know you’ll get there in due time 🫂

Expand full comment
Keanna Hamilton's avatar

I truly and deeply resonated with this.

Expand full comment
Alex thee Black Femme ⚢'s avatar

I’m glad we can relate 🥹 Thank you for reading 💕

Expand full comment
Louise (they/them)'s avatar

Anyways, you’re an amazing writer and poet Alex. Always blessed by your words

Expand full comment
Alex thee Black Femme ⚢'s avatar

Thank you so much Louise 🫶🏾🩷 And I agree, we live in a world that tells people, especially women, that their value is based off of their romantic status and sexual experience. Whether it’s shaming fems for having too much sex or for being prude, we can’t win. I’m over it all!!!

Expand full comment
Not A Sad Story's avatar

I wish people who’ve been lucky with love could understand how aggravating it is to hear their severely out of touch and condescending advice. Take care of yourself! You deserve everything you desire and more and you will receive it!

Expand full comment
pauline lisa doctolero's avatar

thank you for sharing this. it resonated with me so much 💚

Expand full comment
Rachel Simpson's avatar

“After living the life of a ghost, I find it extremely difficult to believe that people can see me, and that visibility is safe.”

THISSS!!!!! I felt this down to my core.

Expand full comment